Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Idiotherapy

Last year, after dinking in both the Nicholl Fellowship and the Austin Film Festival, I found some small measure of solace in writing gibberish. Oh yeah. I wrote silly Jabberwocky-ish poems and short stories and even emails that smacked of a hallucinogenic nucleus.

Nonsense can be mildly therapeutic.

We writers are control freaks who type worlds into existence and ordain our characters to behave precisely as we choose. It's no wonder that we don't handle rejection well. Rejection doesn't fit into our grand scheme and it makes us feel out of sorts and out of control.

When an environment is disorderly, confused, or illogical, people often seek to take control in other ways. Bulimia and anorexia are fertilized by such a need to restore order. I have a different approach. When nothing is as it should be, I find that escalating the lunacy of the situation will often make the helter-skelter seem less helter-skelterish.

Not following me? Well, it's like an overweight girl who hangs out with even heavier girls so she doesn't feel so big. She escalates the situation in her environment as opposed to taking control by refusing to eat at all or by binging and barfing. All three are dysfunctional responses but all three give the illusion of a solved problem -- order -- and leave little room for a voice of reason to interfere.

So yes, I know that writing nonsense is not the solution to my problem. I need to buckle down, study harder, find the weaknesses in my screenwriting and take positive steps to improve my existing screenplays and write new ones that are sharper, stronger, and less resistible. I need to restore order the right way.

And, I will.

Eventually.

For now, rather than scrutinize my harsh reflection in the looking glass, I'll go the Lewis Carroll route and explore what's on the other side. Many wrtiers have found success on the other side so who knows? This time, I might just stay there.

But I doubt it.

Remember Sal? That little voice of reason that lurks in my head and calls me to task when I'm irrational? He's allergic to white rabbits.

4 comments:

Unknown Screenwriter said...

UNK
Where is she?

SAL
She needs a little vacation.

UNK
Are you really allergic to
white rabbits?

SAL
Did SHE tell you that?

UNK
Tell me what?

West. Wewax. Then back to it. Clear them frontal lobes...

Unk

Sal said...

PLaying around for a while with different styles or forms is good - sometimes the mind just needs a little break in order to come back fresh - mine does, anyway.

Mystery Man said...

Love the name "Idiotherapy." Nothing wrong with a little bit of that from time to time.

Ya know, every time I see that sitepal thingee, I think, "wow. That MaryAn's a cutie."

Hehehe...

-MM

moviequill said...

I'm waiting for the Site Pal cutie to say a naughty word heh