Tuesday, January 09, 2007

No Place Like Home

So far, this hasn’t been such a great week for me. I kind of got caught burning the candle at both ends and well, see hottie cartoon me? Yeah, that's where I wound up after a bizarre lightning in my head episode. All is well. No worries. It took two days and thousands of dollars in catscans, EEG's, MRI's , EKG's, and chest x-rays to diagnose me as overworked, exhausted, and stressed beyond human capacity -- but in perfect health.

For future reference, if you should ever feel like your eyes are suddenly inflating, your brain is full of helium and you have an odd vertigo-type feeling that makes you mistake the floor for an ocean swell, surf ye to a fire station lest ye find yeeself sprawled out on an unmopped floor in a public place and in an unladylike position.

Kowabunga, baby.

Oh, and remember what your mom said about clean underwear in case you need to go the hospital? Well, if you have frequent migraines, you might also consider sports bras. No underwire. You can keep them on during catscans.

A hospital is no place for rest, by the way, especially if you room with Mrs. Roper and she insists on describing, in minute detail, her hemorrhoids, hernias, and displaced bladder. Then there's Stanley's waning virility...

I'll be back after I've had some sleep.

11 comments:

ECHenry said...

Time for a little Fernando, of Saturday Night Live fame, interlude: "It's better to look good, then to feel good, and for someone just back from the hostpital darling, you look marvelous!"

I feel sick too. Stinging eyes, sick stomache, lethargic. Out in Washington we have these high flying planes that look like they are dispencing something. I wonder if we're being secretly poisoned.

You're not the only one "gutting it out." We may never really know what we were up against during our brief lives. But my advice to you is, "fight the good fight untill Jesus calls you home."

I'm on your side, Marry Ann. I hope you feel better soon.

- E.C. Henry from Bonney Lake, WA

Eddie said...

Wishing you well, MaryAn.

I can't help but love the Stanley kicker. :-)

Unk said...

Better yet?

Unk

MaryAn Batchellor said...

Better, thank you so much for asking. Have a diagnosis that requires a few more tests. It's not great. Could be worse. But it explains excessive numbers of migraines. The important thing here is that I CAN STILL WRITE!

And, FYI, the next portion of my "season of rewrites" is (drum roll, please)

STRONGER VERBS!

Unk said...

More to come after this rewrite... LOL.

Unk

MaryAn Batchellor said...

Regrettably, I have no doubt you are correct. But if hottie cartoon me wasn't busted, you'd hear her singing a snappy tune about -- never mind. I'll just fix her.

Unk said...

Does hottie cartoon you know CPR?

Unk

Robert Hogan said...

Get some good rest. Hope you are feeling better soon MaryAn.

Grubber said...

I hope you make a quick recovery Maryan. Best of luck with it all.
cheers
Dave

mernitman said...

That must've been SCARY. Your good humor's about it all is awesome (as in, geneuinely inspiring awe).

mernitman said...

(and does my perfect spelling say anything to you?) ;-)